People, if I catch you mashing the walk button and then venturing out in to the road before this happens, I am now going to start honking my horn and yelling at you in order to set your self absorbed ass straight. How many hours of my life have been wasted sitting at red lights waiting for a walk sign as I stare at the back of your head, 20 yards down the road?

If you whack that button, you better goddamn stand there until it changes. I don’t care if tumbleweeds are blowing across the street. Lay in your bed, idiot.

A girl this morning didn’t even hesitate. She has honed the art of wasting the time of countless other commuters to a fine fucking edge. Without breaking stride, she hit the button on the way by and proceeded right out in the road. Oh, my God – thanks for your consideration!

Frankly, I don’t even understand the point of the Walk signal, except in the case of a truly convoluted intersection. 50% of the time the traffic is going in your direction. That means every other cycle will be in your favor, which is exactly the same frequency with which you’ll most likely get the walk signal! Why do you need a written invitation to cross the street, that you aren’t going to wait for anyway?!?! Oh, but we’ll all wait here patiently in our cars for it. No worries! This is officially now at the top of my pet peeve list. My life mission, should I choose to accept it, is to educate every last MF’er on the planet to stop it with this bullshit.